Seriously I need an editor

I was just looking over my last blog and there are things I meant to say and words that get dropped and then the meaning gets change which is kind of funny and points to the imperfection of word. The best I can do is try to emit a feeling or emotion thru this medium and and let loose the flood gets of my unconscious and somehow in the process help people in their process to do the same. We play the same games all life getting the same results waiting for all that to change, but never willing to put it all on the line and be that change. We all need to take a huge leap of faith into the unknown and allow ourselves to peel away the layers and leave ourselves open and vulnerable and just be in this moment and hold that space to stillness and watch the system crack apart around. We say too much that we don't actually intend to follow thru on. We are at a point where the earth is giving us warning signs to awaken to who we are otherwise there won't be much of a world left to awaken to for ourselves and future generations. The choices that we make right now to awaken determines so much for so many. FInding our inner grace has never been so readily available in a long time. So if you want delve inside of your own oyster which is you and allow that pearl to reveal itself to the whole world. Here we are just waiting for the facade to fully crack apart and for all of us to be honest with ourselves and then we can start to be honest with our friends, family, and people that we call strangers but truthfully most of us have been strangers to ourselves for a long time. Long time short time and eventually no time and we can see that there is no separation accept what we perceive in the mind. Let the suffering stop and let the healing happen and may the grace heal us all.

Do You Remember Me

In all world where everything is changing all the time I have noticed wherever I go people want to be remembered and one of the first questions people will ask me is if I remember them. It is like they are testing me or really testing themselves and some of them give a response before I have a chance to say anything positive that I couldn't actually remember them. Quite often people's jaws will drop and sometimes I need them to say the right phrase or location and it will all come flooding back to me. Yet I was thinking how much people want to be remembered but more importantly people want to be recognized on a level that is much deeper then they realize. People want their spirit to be acknowledge even more then they want their identity validated. Recognize people's spirit and allow the ego to do what it wants but don't respond to the thrashing and clawing of the ego speak to their soul they will love you forever if you just talk to who they really are because it makes them recognize who they really are beyond this form and name that we mistakenly taken to be all of whom we are.

I'm in A Rothbury State of Mind

Yes I am totally aware that I just jacked Billy Joel. I am sure he can pardon since I am innocent man and he is a piano man and Greyhound has been somewhat replaced by Craigslist. I know you get the jist. Lets stop saying "I don't know" especially when we know and just don't want to say so. SO SO SO SO what else but still if my mind is not still I become oh so ill and I stop giving out pills because it breaks our will to change the status Dough and there is no status flow but there is the status blow and I am not talking Johnny Depp but we can still go oh so deep and creep til we weep that the chimney man has no chimney and Jimney cricket can't afford to be anywhere anymore because he has too many tickets and eats badly so now he has rickets. But we just need to kick it and yes then perhaps we can lick it, but I am talking about leprosy. We are that change and we are the men and women in the mirror and neverland is not just a ranch but a branch of American soul history like Graceland. But don't worry Dolly we can still give your fair share of lolly pops and yes they said June 25 2009 was the day that pop music and one of Charlie's angels died and still I cry and we all just need to get a little bit crazy which is alot better then being a whole lot lazy... Oh yeah yeah yeah yeah's give me a map so I can find if they don't really love me like you love me. I can't wait and I can't dance and I can't sing but I can raise myself to the occasion and sometimes I am known to be an emperor of persuasion. We are going to Graceland if Paul Simon and that other guy marc Cohen won't stop mowing my lawn that has no grass. BEcause my ass was grass and that song was the lawnmower and now there is no ass to be found but I don't want to be crass but sometimes I swear I think my voice can break glass. Try Michigan it worked for Iggie Pop but still they say Pop is dead and we all need to find Right Said Fred. Thread the needle and we can end the H train out of Afghanistan I am going to Iran if we don't quickly come up with a plan and my man stan (a.k.a my dad) needs to get a vegetable oil van. Okay I admit maybe I take it too far and maybe there is no maybe just yes and no and too many people that say I don't know. Let us grow and know we can all go to Rothbury which is supposedly a spelling mistake and my ache breaky heart broke when Miley tryed to mess with my Radiohead because they did not cowtow to her superstar demands. I command to help humanity for a one man band and we can it make this world amazingly grand but we don't need to make a stand instead we just shall be the nothingness until we all feeel estatic bliss.

I Press To Express Divinity thru Dance

Since I was a young child I have nothing could affect a mass of people so quickly as my dance moves, but there is very little that I do from a technical stand point that isn't relatively easy to imitate. Yet their is an intensity and devotion that takes place in my dancing an expression of everything that I have ever been and everything that I will ever be that comes out when I am really dancing when I am really going for broke. There is something about going for broke that is perhaps one of the sexiest and foolish things imaginable. To be a bridge between this world and world that remains unseen by most yet still it dictates everything that happens down here. I reach such an ecstatic states of joy and exhaustion when I dance. There is a deep real love being expressed as if I could just zip out of my body and expand into cosmos. Every emotion that is welled up inside of me all starts to explode at once and it is a symphony and there are moments in the process where I become completely still and don't move it all. People will remember me years later from seeing me dance one time at one place for one moment. It was not until I just typed that I realized how special that makes it. In many ways I just take that for granted. Some people would it is just merely because I am tall or merely because I am "spazz", but that doesn't really get at it nor explain the reaction as far as I can tell. I have seen people dance much better then myself yet there remains something hidden and secretive in their dance and a joy and bliss that are not shared thru the experience.

JUst Trying TO make it Back Home

Where is home is the question that people either take for granted or give an immediate response about and usually one I find myself always giving a different reply. Recently I find myself wanting to say the Himalayas in the past I used to Say Burning Man, Same place as everyone else, or wherever I happened to be in that moment. I keep concentrating that we are all just beams of light making our way back to the sun/God/Divinity/whatever you call or don't call. I find myself trying to put pieces of the puzzle together yet there is nothing to put together rather layers within myself to unravel. Self defenses to let down and expectations to drop so that I can experience things exactly as they are instead of how my mind says they should be. Sometimes I find myself wanting to be egotistical for the sake of being egotistical and ignoring the truth of who we all are. If other people pretend they are not special long enough you might actually start to believe their story. And that's all ever is a "story" until we drop the story and their is just a beautiful infinite emptiness and oblivion of bliss that people seek to imitate thru sex, drugs, and other sense gratifications and yet it only poorly imitates. I can't keep pretending or imitating or duplicating and trying to make sense of infinite with a finite perspective. I have known people in their different phases as they have known me in my different legs of the journey. One day soon someone will be sitting down to edit this and this will reach millions of people around the world. This is something I have known and it is not because I am such a great writer but I offering people a small reminder of their true nature. Buddha/CHrist/Mohammad/Moses/Khrisna or No thing at all and may all the E gos fall and none of us will be small or tall we are all part of the same cosmic ball. We are reaching towards A NEW Day and before we get to that point in can sting and be quite painful, B UTT that can lead to a GRowTH of a new AWARENESS that IS MORE VIBRant yet constant so that it becomes the norm instead of merely a passing feeling.

Brand New Chapter

Sometimes you just know a new chapter is about to begin in your life and right before it happens things seem to get extra quiet. Appreciate that silence because you will look back on it longingly later on. Yet often we look back on things from the past with deep longing.Yet this moment is the perfect for all that is and yet knowing that we can still strive to find more of what is inside of ourselves. As each one of us awakens to our life's path it makes it easier for others to do the same. They are presented with more mirrors to show them the way towards their own bliss. I am back in Ann Arbor, Michigan and recently payed respects to the wife of my former tai-chi-gong master and yet still have no more answers about how he awakened my gift within me. My spiritual journey grows stronger and on occasion my mind distracts me from the greater task at hand yet it continues to lose its power to do so. My focus and concentration grows stronger and my heart opens more and as the day unfolds more is revealed to me. I Am finishing an 8 year cycle which represents infinite and an new cycle is beginning. Remember "crazy" people have a way of seeing and speaking about the same things we see and perceive but refuse to acknowledge because it makes us uncomfortable. The Himalayas get closer and closer to penetrating the core of American Spirituality. Jesus or Issa's missing time has always held a particular fascination for me. Anyone of us awakening helps all of us to awaken to our true Christ/Buddha nature. We are beings of "Light" let that permeate thru your entire being. Sometimes we can see the potential for something down the road yet we have to deal with the ravine that we have to cross right now. We can have awareness of what awaits us later but we have to bring our immediate attention to the now and it will make things down the road much more special. Nothing is quite as it seems, but this is no reason to be paranoid about such a thing. Your unconditional love is your shield against all that the world can hoist at you. Be your own best friend and the world will do the same. Have patience and perservance and all shall be rewarded. The journey is long and arduous but the results are more then we can imagine. Keep taking your steps keep transforming as we create a new day and a new chapter.

Just Go with What feels right for you

I wonder what exactly makes for a proper education in a world where we are taught to seek outside of ourselves for our validation. Nothing is ever big enough and everything is super sized until you become sick yet we are over eating and are still under nourished. I found myself in Woodstock New York on my way to Burlington Vermont. I recently spent time with a Saint named Amma and not the one who is known for hugging. We all have to find our peace with ourselves and we all have our own way of going about finding this. It is easy not to judge when somebody doesn't judge you, but the greater challenge lies in not judging when somebody judges you. I am not different then anyone in that I seek a greater peace and joy within my own being that is not dependent on circumstances of any kind. I have been greatly benefited and gifted by many people along the way and continue to strive to experience and know the interconnectedness that we all share. I seek to express my emotions, thoughts and sentiments and to realize that I have not fully liberated myself until I no longer look outside of myself for validation that will never be enough for an ego that doesn't want to acknowledge its fleetingness. I always felt there was something more then what I was told. To be a spiritual seeker is to be deemed a Slacker, Lunatic, outcast and prophet and yet you are known and all of these things. I seek the council of those who have found a greater peace and acceptance then myself so that I can be guided back to my natural essence which is true for all of us. I wake up in a different place on a regular basis and each day offers new possibilities if I am open to a new experience that guides me closer to the source that we all come from. We all return from whence we came from and so much of the other stuff is merely a distraction from our true nature which we are told is foolhardy to seek. May we all be so lucky to be so foolhardy.